Months of planning. Weeks of worry. One enormous, stressful, beautiful whirlwind of a day. Things couldn’t have gone more perfectly. But why? What was it about your wedding day that felt so right? What is that special, intangible nugget at the center of your ceremony that carries the day and makes it uniquely yours? At Wows and Vows, we like to call that the vibe.
The “wedding vibe” might sound silly or trite, but it’s an essential part of the planning process and one that I prioritize when meeting couples for the first time. When I meet a new couple, I hand a list of adjectives to each partner. I say, "If you had to choose three of the following adjectives to best describe the feel you intend for your ceremony, which three would you select?"
My goal is to get to the heart of the couple’s priorities and personalities and tailor a custom ceremony to the essence of their relationship. Do they want traditional or modern? Religious or secular? Formal or lighthearted? Do they want a themed wedding? Star Trek, Harry Potter, The Lord of the Rings?—we’re never opposed to getting a little nerdy. Because it’s all about what you want.
Do you want to include your family? Your pets? Are you looking for a humorous approach or something a little more serious? Trust me, I have no problem being a comedian, but I know when to leave it at the door, too. Do you want all of your guests to wear Hawaiian shirts and leis? Count us in. We love a good beach-themed wedding.
Once the couple has looked over my list, I ask them to choose three adjectives that describe their ideal wedding day. That’s right, just three. Each of the partners do this individually. Then, I ask clarifying questions of each and record what they say. I do this to establish a balance between the couple’s visions and help them draft the perfect ceremony. The good news? I’ve officiated all kinds of ceremonies and I enjoy the challenges that writing a custom ceremony brings.
Let’s say you want a family-oriented ceremony; I can suggest ways to include them. Perhaps you want a wedding that is personal and sentimental; I can bring up your favorite memories of each other and weave together a love story that captures your greatest hits. If you’d like a ceremony that’s fun and light-hearted, you’ve come to the right person. I can draw on your humor and the funny stories you share to get the whole room laughing.
As custom-ceremony writers and officiants, our priority is to capture you. It’s important to us that you look back on your wedding day as the perfect encapsulation of your love story and your shared vibe. Remember, it's all about you.
Tell us about your perfect wedding vibe in the comments!